Song / Setting conversation betwixt Marissa P. and Perry. Responses by Perry.
SONGS FROM THE NEW ALBUM, "what if someone is watching thier t.v.?" BY SCREAMING FEMALES
1. THEME SONG: In the middle of a 70's freakout dance party where large transvestites are dancing in cages and bunny rabbits are painted on the wall....and there's a man there....with a top hat on....and sunglasses.
2. THE REAL MOTHERS: You're driving an airplane to Zimbabwe and you realize halfway there you forgot your sunblock.
3. HUMANITY ARRANGED: Sittin on the lawn chair in the backyard...relaxin'...sunglasses on...with the dog sittin under the lawn chair...smokin' a bowl.
4. STARVE THE BEAT: this is the song you listen to in synogauge on your headphones when you dont wanna hear what the rabbi is saying then he catches you listening, points you out in front of everyone in the congregation and then he tries to make an example of you and screaming females rock out congregation style on stage in front of all of the local jewish folk!
5. LITTLE ANNE: you're in front of your classroom to give a presentation in english class and you decide to do a song, so you got your little drum and youre playing Little Anne, and everyone in the class likes it, it's soothing, then afterwards the teacher takes you into the teachers lounge! (NO STUDENTS ALLOWED!!!!) SWEET HOOKUPS.
6. FUN: You're driving down the highway so fast like 86 mph, the speed limit is only 85!!!!!!!! a cop pulls you over, he's so mad like AHHHHHH NO SPEEDING. then he's like... "what are you listening to? it sounds FUN" and youre all like, NO SHIT IT IS FUCKIN FUN. and he's like dancing in the middle of the intersection and everyone stops and it's like that bjork video where shes dancing down the street but instead of bjork its King Mike and he's wearing a sombrero.
7. LIMBS: there's a circle of native americans around a fire, they start jamming and its this fucking song, but they didnt write it, it came from the gods themselves, god Baklava, king of deliciousness, and the head indian cheif is singing these words and everyone starts laughing because he has toilet paper stuck to his foot.
8. PEDRO: you're in the desert and there's nothing around for miles...you finally find an old skeleton laying in sand. you start playing pedro. he leaps up! HE'S JUST BONES! BUT HE'S DANCING NOW! then you realize it's got nothing to do with the song, just that there's a scorpion on his foot. BUT THE SCORPION IS DANCING! AND HE DOESN'T STOP. EVER.
9.MOTHERSHIP: Jesus was rockin out to this song before he got crucified. what happened was the bad dudes came and stole his ipod. after that he was so mad. he was all like "yo i seriously was diggin that tune" and the bad dudes were just like "i dont give a care" and he was like "that doesn't even make sense!" so they beat him up and killed him. this song was on during the afterparty. which only means, jesus dicovered the screaming females.
10. BOYFRIEND: Tony Hawk was skateboarding the 480 degree loop!!!! FIRST TIME and he wasnt sure if he could do it or not. so he called Marissa P. up and asked her...here's the conversation...
TONY HAWK: marissa! it's me tony!
MARISSA: what up boo?
TONY HAWK: marissa marissa! can i do the 480 loop? it's so huge like the size of the whole entire equator!
MARISSA: dude bro, you totally got what it takes. here take this hit single "boyfriend" by the band Screaming Females
TONY HAWK: okay cool (TONY LISTENS)
MARISSA: boss tony, did you listen?
TONY HAWK: YES! BUT NOW I JUST WANT TO EAT 10 SANDWICHES!
MARISSA: you know what you must do.
TONY HAWK: sells his skateboards and opens a deli